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February 05, 2005

He's Just Not That Into You

I'm reading the book, He's Just Not That Into You by comic, Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo (she's some writer on Sex and The City)...it's a guide for women, all about men. I'm a man, and yes I am reading it. Why? Because I love Greg Behrendt- he's hilarious from all the stuff I have seen from him (on HBO and Comedy Central mainly). Anyhow, it's interesting so far, and funny as I thought it'd be.

It's comforting to know that Greg says that if a guy likes you, he will want to talk to you daily, if not hourly. I sometimes wonder if I want to talk to my (not sure what to call her...she's not my girlfriend, we but are dating) too much, or if I'm coming on too strong. I try my best to be cool and not get into serious conversations about feelings. Long story, but I'm just taking it day by day for now, and leaving all the mushy stuff and serious convo's about feelings out for now. I do try to tell her how beautiful I think she is tho, as much as I can...because she really is, and I don't want her to forget how beautiful she is in my eyes. I don't say I love you that much, but I do my best with my actions and the way I treat her to show her that I do, indeed, love her with all of my heart.

Interesting stuff...much of which is quite obvious and clear to me, since I AM a guy, and I do like women. But, also some insights that make me feel a little better about my situation and the way I feel about the woman I love. Just to know that someone else sees things the same way is somewhat comforting, I guess.

The format of the book is nice. It has questions asked by women, and Greg gives the answers- it's mostly him telling the girl that when the guy does X, Y, and Z that this means that he's just not that into you, and to get rid of him to find a guy who IS into you and won't do the bad things that show he's not into you. ("Don't waste the pretty", Greg says...)

Here is an excerpt from the book on the chapter about guys who don't want the title of boyfriend ("I don't want to be your boyfriend" will always mean "I don't want to be your boyfriend", he points out.)

Men, just like women, want to feel emotionally protected when a
relationship starts to become serious. One way they do that is
by laying claim to it. They actually want to say "I'm your
boyfriend" or "I'd like to be your boyfriend" or "If you ever
break up with that other guy who's not your boyfriend, I'd like
to be your boyfriend." A man who's really into you is going to
want you all to himself. And why wouldn't he, hot stuff?

I would have to disagree with him in the first chapter and intro when he talks about how men are driven by sex, because I don't feel that way at all. I'm surely not driven by sex- personally, when I'm with the woman I'm currently with, sex is totally out of my mind, and I have no desire to pursue that option. Sure, sometimes I want to, but in the scope of things, it certainly isn't the biggest factor or anywhere near it.

At the same time, I'm trying to finish the novel, The Breathtaker, about a serial killer who attacks people in the line of tornadoes...all about weather, storm chasers, a small town police chief, his daughter, and the search for a ritualistic killer. Nearly done with that, and it's also been a pretty good book thus far.

I need to pick up the book, The Case For Freedom by Natan Charansky (not sure if that's how you spell his name, and I'm just too lazy to look it up right now.)

Posted by Josh at February 5, 2005 02:08 PM

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